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Waiting for Satanot

May 27, 2012

 
                                                                    Words by: Wentworth Miller
                                                                     Directed by: Sam Mendez

                                                                                                 Cast:
                                                                     Samuel Beckett – Scott Bakula
                                                                     Other Writer – Paul Giamatti
                                                                     Satanot – Wentworth Miller

ACT ONE – SCENE ONE
Samuel Beckett and another writer I can’t remember the name of who wrote something once that was kinda clever but then dull after two pages sit next to a tree in Hell.
Beckett is trying to take off one of his boots.

OTHER: Here we are then.
BECKETT: Are we?
OTHER: Aren’t we?
Beckett struggles with his boot.

OTHER: What are you doing?
BECKETT: Taking off this boot.
OTHER: Why?
BECKETT: Why not?
OTHER: You’ll just have to put it on again tomorrow.
BECKETT: So? It’s what I always do at this time of the day.
OTHER: Why?
BECKETT: Why not?

They fall silent. Beckett gets his boot off and inspects it. The Other writer looks at the white space of Hell around them.

OTHER: Hey, it looks pretty cool over there.
BECKETT: Where?
OTHER: [Pointing] There.
BECKETT: It looks the same as any other place here.
OTHER: Does it?
BECKETT: Doesn’t it?
OTHER: Maybe it’s better. I think we should check it out.
BECKETT: Should we?
OTHER: Shouldn’t we?
Beckett looks at the white space over there again and then nods.
BECKETT: Fine, let’s go.
They don’t move.
OTHER: We’re not moving.
BECKETT: We can’t.
OTHER: Why not?
BECKETT: We’re waiting for Satanot.
OTHER: Is he definitely coming?
BECKETT: Sure. He said he’d meet us by this tree.
OTHER: But what if he’s not coming?
BECKETT: Why wouldn’t he come?
OTHER: Why would he?
BECKETT: It’s best to wait.
OTHER: For how long?
BECKETT: Until he comes.

They wait.

Satanot arrives, holding a plastic trident.

BECKETT: Al? That you?
SATANOT: No.
BECKETT: Ziggy?
SATANOT: Nope.
BECKETT: Who are you then?
SATANOT: I’m Satanot.
Beckett and the other writer look confused.

SATANOT: You know, we spoke on the phone…
BECKETT: Did we?
OTHER: Didn’t you?
SATANOT: Yes, we did. I told you I was on my way, and now I’m here.
BECKETT: Are you?
SATANOT: Clearly.
BECKETT: I don’t have a phone.
OTHER: Why would you need a phone?
BECKETT: To call someone.
OTHER: Call who?
BECKETT: Someone.
OTHER: To say what?
BECKETT: Something.
OTHER: Why?
BECKETT: Why not?
Satanot scratches his chin with the tip of the trident. He looks at his watch.

SATANOT: Look, I don’t have time for this. We have to go.
BECKETT: Go where?
SATANOT: To your own personal hells.
BECKETT: Why?
SATANOT: Because you’re both really fucking annoying.
BECKETT: Are we?
SATANOT: Yup.
BECKETT: And we have to go to Hell?
SATANOT: Not just Hell. Your own personal hells.
OTHER: I don’t know. It sounds kinda definite.
BECKETT: I agree. [To Satanot] Is this personal hell a place where we will know things for certain?
SATANOT: If that makes you sad, yes.
BECKETT: Oh.
OTHER: Is it a place where we can be indecisive?
SATANOT: No. I mean, it’s irrelevant. I’m the boss here. You no longer have to make any decisions or think or explore the nature or non-nature of anything.
BECKETT: Sounds pointless if you ask me.
OTHER: Me too.
BECKETT: Okay, we’ll go.
SATANOT: It wasn’t really a choice. You’ll come or I’ll drag you by the hair.
BECKETT: Can I just have one last cigarette and reflect on this?
SATANOT: No.
OTHER: Can I just carve a message into the trunk of this tree telling others how pointless it is to carve messages into trees?
SATANOT: No.
BECKETT: Can I just point out how hopelessly ironic this whole situation is to anyone who might be watching?
SATANOT: There is no one watching.
BECKETT: Even better.
OTHER: Hey, maybe I can point out your point and then you can point it out back to me?
SATANOT: Enough. You’re going round in circles. I don’t like it.
BECKETT: Everything is repetition.
OTHER: Repetition is everything.
SATANOT: Bullshit. Now, get up and start walking.
BECKETT: Fine, let’s go.
OTHER: Yes. Let’s.
SATANOT: Finally.

Satanot starts walking away, but the two men stay where they are. Satanot gets about twenty metres before realising, turns and comes back.
SATANOT: You’re not moving.
BECKETT: We can’t.
SATANOT: Why not?
BECKETT: We’re waiting for Satanot.
SATANOT: I’m Satanot. I told you that already.
BECKETT: Are you?
OTHER: Isn’t he?
BECKETT: He might be lying to us.
OTHER: How can we tell?
BECKETT: We can’t.
OTHER: Then what should we do?
BECKETT: Wait here.
OTHER: For how long?
BECKETT: Until Satanot comes.
OTHER: How long will that be?
BECKETT: I don’t know.
SATANOT: For fuck’s sake.

Satanot grabs them by the hair and drags them away from the tree and into their own personal hells, both of which have plots and characters that say what they mean and do what they say.

END OF SCENE AND PLAY

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One Comment leave one →
  1. May 28, 2012 12:44 pm

    This made me laugh out loud!

    Especially liked the last line:

    “both of which have plots and characters that say what they mean and do what they say.”

    🙂

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