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The belief that women like jerks contains hints of misogyny because it stems from the stereotype that women want to be dominated and controlled.

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Human beings are not rewards for kindness. Sometimes, nice people struggle with their love lives.

Sometimes, not-so-nice people have an easier time. This may seem unfair, but the whole concept of fairness is irrelevant when personal choices are concerned.

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Once again, pop culture reinforces this belief. Viewers are supposed to think it was dense of the woman to not realize that the love she sought was in front of her the whole time. Stories of friends who get together can be sweet, and unrequited crushes on friends are always painful, but there are plenty of valid reasons not to date a friend.

Your friendship is not a consolation prize thzt and the idea of being relegated to friend status hinges on the notion that he was expecting more in the first place.

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And his friendship is not a bargaining token. It should be given freely without expecting anything in return except mutual friendship. The irony is that many of them use this supposed caring to manipulate women into sex or dating.

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Our culture over-classifies men as nice guys, and the effects of this undue admiration are dangerous. Our low standards for men manifest in a number of ways: In addition to applauding Sex friend Guthrie for taking on parenting duties that are expected of women, we praise them for sexual conduct that should be mandatory, not praiseworthy.

I remember seeing a movie called Bgi Tank with a guy I was dating in college. In one scene, the main character — a teenage girl — was partially undressed and asleep.

I was confused.

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I learned this later that day, when we were hanging out in my room. After I thought that was settled, I saw a lascivious grin on his face and realized he had unbuttoned my shirt without me noticing.

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After I pulled away, he apologized. It made sense, really. In Animal Housewhen a girl is about to sleep with one of the protagonists but then passes out drunk, a devil and angel appear on his shoulder.

The implication: Not raping is angelic. Another implication: It takes willpower not to rape. Add to Want to watch this again later?

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